Yesterday when we were closed we spent the day vamping the shop for spring. Michelle was spring cleaning and doing some painting in
Please refer to my disclaimer before reading any of my Nurse Boo categorised posts
Using the term ‘break a leg’ in a theatre just took on a whole new meaning.
When I considered embarking on a career in nursing, a lot of my decisions were based on my own hospital experiences. Having 5 surgeries in 3 years created a lot of curiousity as to what actually happens after they’ve injected me with my ‘gin and tonic’, as my anaesthetist always said as he plunged the fluid into the cannula in my hand. I’d remember that moment and wake up what seemed like moments later with someone calling my name, telling me that my operation was over and usually frantically trying to focus my eyes on the clock hands to see how long I’d actually been under, which was usually an indication of how much had been done. With endometriosis surgery, they never really know what they are dealing with until they get in there and see as most endometriosis doesn’t show up on scans. When I thought about my own nurses who had cared for me and my own fears and anxieties about having surgery, there were some great and some bad, and those are the ones you remember, they impact you, they change the way you feel and think, they are the line between pain and comfort and between anxiety and reassurance, they tip the scale either way. One of the ‘good’ ones I’m friends with on Facebook, she found me after I sent her a card to thank her for caring for me through two of my surgeries. I remember how she made me feel, how she listened to me and she became my advocate when I needed it. Another ‘good’ one, when coming into my room to introduce herself after starting the night shift on the evening following my surgery, literally lit up the room with her smile and the honest kindness of her face. Such a small thing but makes such a difference and makes you want to smile back, no matter what.
My experience having surgery multiple times made me interested in nursing, made me see that I could make a difference and that my understanding of the process and the feelings involved would give me an advantage. It was a succession of distressing experiences for me, but ones I conquered and I wear my scars as tattoos that I didn’t chose, but that tell my story and show my courage and strength for all to see whether I like it or not. My curiousity and belief in my ability to be someone who could care for someone like me are what led me to consider nursing, which then became a desire to make something good out of all the bad experiences I’d had in hospitals and with my own health, and I truly believe that’s what being successful in nursing can do for me. When thinking about ‘areas’ of nursing I would be interested in, based on this my interests were something theatre related, simply because I knew I would know how to care for someone who was experiencing something that I had personally experienced, and it would also feed my own curiousity into what happened behind the curtain of the anaesthetic, to see the show inside the theatre and understand every aspect. But why make a career out of it you may say? Why not just watch some surgeries on YouTube or something? And you would be right to question that.
Many people who know me well have looked at me with a struggled look on their face as to why on earth I would want to be a part of people’s operations? Why I would want to see someone being cut open and then question how I would cope with ‘all the blood and gore’ I guess going through the mill a little bit with my own surgery experiences meant I was less phased by all that – yes it’s my own blood and gore, but I was always surprised at how ‘ok’ I was with it all, especially the more times I went in there!! Yes in reality I had no idea how I would cope with other people’s blood and gore, but my instinct told me that I would be ok.
I truly believe everything happens for a reason, I always have, and unless anything in particular really sways me away from this line of thought, then I will continue to believe this. Being a patient made me want to be a nurse, a nurse who would know what a patient needs. Being able to care for someone the way I know I needed to be cared for myself. To put right all the mistakes the ‘bad’ nurses made and embrace and replicate the greatness and kindness of ‘the good ones’. They say that nursing is ‘a calling’ and maybe it is, it’s something some people still think is a ‘strange’ choice for me, and the funny thing is that when I tell people I work with in the hospital what I used to do, they are always absolutely flabbergasted as to why I have chosen to do nursing now? It’s something I don’t think I could explain in writing or even verbally if I tried, but something just feels right. So it’s a strange coincidence, or maybe its fate that my first placement, and first ever experience working in a hospital setting was a 3 month theatre related placement. As the automatic doors slide open in the morning when I press my ID that I wear with pride on a lanyard around my neck and my heavy feet pound the mottled lino flooring up the stairs to my first placement in the theatre admissions unit I don’t feel out of place, I feel like its meant to be.
As I pull my peach coloured scrubs over my curls, I realise I’ve never worn a uniform my whole life, not in primary or secondary schools or any other job, but I wear this uniform with pride. I don’t feel like I’ve taken a step down from being ‘the boss’ to being the ‘student’ in peach when all the ‘real nurses’ are wearing raspberry. I finally get to see theatres from the other side – the side where I wear scrubs and not the hospital gown, the side where I see how the scenes change and the story unfolds within the theatre and my patients are like the characters and I get to be a part of their journey within that. So many of my closest friends are actors on the stage, as was my late Grandfather, so technically ‘theatre’ is in my blood, but I already know this ‘theatre’ will truly be in my heart.
To be continued..
image credit – Zahid H Javali
Affectionately known as Boo to my friends, I opened bake-a-boo in 2006 and after 10 years of making cake dreams come true, hosting fabulous tea parties and releasing a cookbook I have now closed the doors of the tea room. Plagued with severe endometriosis and several food allergies I’m turning all the bad into something good and after being a great patient, I’m now training to hopefully become a ‘great’ nurse! Here I’m sharing my journey, and talking health, my inspirations and life after bake-a-boo…..and of course CAKE! You can take the girl out of the cake shop but you can’t take the cake shop out of the girl so find out here how I can still help you with cakes and treats and parties galore x